Terra Orndorff

Let’s Jump

“Terra! Have you ever run hurdles? Even just messing around in practice?” Mr. Karr rushes up to me. A sprinter who never jumped a hurdle in her life. “We need you in the 300. It doesn’t matter how well you do. They only have one runner. We only have Kim. We’ll get points no matter where you place.”

A rousing speech. How could I say no to so much encouragement? My speed makes up for my lack of proper form, though. I win the race. Kim right behind me. More points than Mr. Karr counts on. I begin my new track career as a hurdler.

“I ran hurdles in high school. Pretty good, too,” she tells me on the way home. Mom never misses a meet. Home or away, she cheers from the sidelines. Looking at her, I now see her long legs. Taller than me by four inches. Perfect for hurdles. Love for the event takes on new meaning in that moment. No longer just something I excel at. Now a legacy. Her legacy.

  A desire, need, takes over. To make her proud. To be like her. Every meet. Home or away. I run. I jump those hurdles. Form improving with each leap.

When a photo prints in the local newspaper of me racing in a big meet, mid jump, Mom immediately cuts it out. Hangs it on the fridge. My cheering section. She brags about my races: “Looks like she floats right over the hurdles!” She brags about my job: “Almost every day after school. Hired her when she was only fourteen!” She brags about my grades: “Straight A’s! Even with sports, friends, and a job!” She brags. She remains the true marvel. A continuous light of support and love that keeps me on course. The one that really needs bragged about.

Mom visited doctors. Seemed normal growing up. We all went to the doctor. Mom had a heart doctor, though. Dr….something. His name evades me. She always told me everything. Minus these appointments. I wished I knew what they discussed. “Everything is fine,” she told me. “Just checkups.” I should have been as invested as she was in everything I did.

Sitting on the balcony with her, I should have asked. We watched the ripples on the pond. On nice days like that, she smoked on the porch. I sat with her. Often in silence, enjoying the quiet of country life. A perfect time for heart-to-hearts. About life, love, friends. Health. But we sat in silence, lost in our own thoughts.